Day 90- DONE!!!

Feeling a bit sentimental about the end...!  the daily emails, the pain of supersets, the mid-project starvation phase, the egg whites, the sweat, the tears, fellow comrades, my good ol’ food scale, milk fat percentage debates, weekly photos shoots (no wait…I derailed on this one)…….

But anyway It’s over, and YEY WE DID IT!! 

Too much to say…. But will try and keep it short.

Day 90:

 ※some more on Flickr

Achievements:

1. Stats:  minus 6.2Kgs,   Minus 6 % body fat.

Wow….Patricks predictions were dead on. Impressive!

(oh that reminds me… for the unofficial record I decided to lose a kilo before having to declare my stats for this program, so I could say it was a 7Kg or so loss in 13 weeks.… cr*p,,,,,,isn’t that like the size of a medium sized dog?)

2. Body happiness!: Before PCP I’d say I was in a state of ‘body agreement’ (as in ‘there are good days and bad days, some imperfections here and there but this’ll do’ sort of mentality. ) but it’s a nice feeling now to look in to the mirror and think every morning: ‘hey, today is a ‘good day’.  So was yesterday and the day before that too!’

3.Noticeable improvement in physical strength. Ability to carry more luggage, sprint further and faster in heels, have higher energy levels during long days etc.

4. Sense of accomplishment and knowing that ‘yes it can be done’.  Just because a) I think I can! And b)The system works!

5. I now have a body that is trustworthy enough to listen to! The ‘Just listen to the body’ idea doesnt work when the body is tone deaf/confused/ needs a slap!…..during the first few weeks of PCP it was telling me that it didn’t want to do the workouts and it was craving sugar all the time.  im glad that Im now at the point now of being able to lend an ear to what it has to say.

6.Change in palate. At the beginning of the program I had an entire list of things I planned on indulging on once this was over, but now. I can honestly say that there is nothing I’d proactively do differently in terms of food.  Go veggies!

 

Take home points:

1. It's not magic, basically ‘you get out what you invest in your body’

2. When getting in shape….approach diet & exercise simultaneously. I feel a bit silly looking back but I have only ever focused on one of these at a time.

3. Going forwards, exercise, every day.  Choose some days out of those to do more.

4. food:  not too much carbs.  consume good protein. Lots of veg.  stay away from things grandma wouldn’t know.   Eat in small doses through out the day.  Don’t over do it at night.   consume it only if you intend to burn it off.

5.. Learnt to not to let social norms dictate my personal objectives. Eg/ just because everyone else thinks having a pile of veggies on top of a spoonful of carbs is weird….at the end of the day, who’s healthier? Same goes for the ‘it’s a Friday so we must drink’ mentality,  and also…..The African famine is tragic, but me stuffing my self with food which I would rather leave on my plate is not going to help them at the slightest.  Etc.

Oops……..so much for the short blog post!

Could go on forever but will wrap it up.  Would like to finish by saying thanks you’s!

Patrick-  thank you for everything you did to enable this!!…… & I also appreciate your patience for putting up with things like my ‘chicken legs paranoia’ and annoying philosophical questions I keep asking on the thread challenging the fundamentals etc!  

 Team MM, its been great training with you all!  Im really sorry that my PC environment didn’t let me post comments as often as I would have liked to, but have been following your blogs and its truly been an inspiration/wake up call/ comforting/ encouraging/ motivational.  Same goes for the rest of the ‘mid summers night dream’ crew also, its reading your blogs, comments left on mine reassuring im on the right track, all those discussions threads that kept the momentum going!  And Marcus… From introducing the idea to me, to helping me through workouts, to supporting me emotionally (near, far, wherever you are!) Thank you!!  and by the way you look totally great and I cant wait to see you this week so I can………. (ok, lets take this off line shall we.)

Will probably post once more around mid sept when I figure out where I want to go with this next and hopefully to report that life has not fallen apart since PCP ended and that I am still in control of everything….

But in the mean time, YEEY  congratulations & Happy PC to us all :-D!!!

Day 73....& counting down!

Oops..been really quiet with the blogging lately..........here's the status update>>

progress:

weight loss is stagnant. im drifting around the -5 ~ -6Kg range depending on the day, nothing more and nothing less. im pretty happy with the achievement so far, and im not actively dissatistisfied with any part of my body currently  (which is like a new era)  but numerically speaking i would like to squeeze out another kilo or so before we finish up,,, and further ab definition couldnt hurt either,

so continue I shall. (I've come to terms of the fact that the minus 10Kg fantasy will not quite happen.  ....its not the end of the world...)

work outs:

the number of reps is unreal.  its been a constant cycle of death-resurrection this week. im quite liking the extended planking though -no movement involved, so good time to read magazines!

food: -absolutly loving being able to eat food for dinner which actually resembles a proper meal as of this week.

-im appreciating 'naughty' food more.  had a slight deviation on one day and had small slice of quiche. wow.....butter has never tasted more heavenly!

on the subject of heaven,

-about my indulgence (that quiche was too small to count!)

while marcus was in Japan (btw.... oh he looks good)  we went for an onsen break :-D my belated and much anticipated indulgence was this:

after apples & egg white dinners this felt exceedingly extravagant to say the least.  but told my self i deserved it, and also justified it thinking 'this technically isnt an 'unhealthy meal'....it's just a healthy meal which is really big...! '

also had sake.   loved it all! 
& i am happy and partially disappointed to say that none of this made me sick the next day like it was supposed to....

Other:
-maybe its the enhanced core strength......but i find my self not losing balance on high heels on crowded trains these days.

-My improved biceps seem to enable me to carry around increasing & vast amounts of luggage and groceries each day.  (the other day I weighed my luggage and it was 5.5Kgs.

 I'm thinking 'wow......i carried around this for the whole day- which is the same amount of weight I lost off my body, on my arms!')

-I was previously worried about my obsessive tendancies on this project  (ie/'oh my god i missed a workout yesterday. I am such a failure' or 'if i go near 3m radius of cake, it will reverse all the progress to date and god will send me to hell') but i am happy to say that phase has passed and i am more chilled about the whole initiative.

i think i am more confident about self management knowing a)that I know what I want/need and how much of it  b)regardless of what happens after a mess up.. it is physically possible to shed 5-6kgs in 2 months.

will try not to go the other way and be over chilled/lenient with my self....but mentally speaking its a nice place to be.

-I notice I attract more weirdos (men) on the streets these days..

-I'm dying to go shopping!!!

Day 62: back with the zest

Ｔhank you all so much for supportive comments!   Its been really reassuring, because although im aware im making progress numerically, i've just not had much of a life (if any) recently because of work/pcp/study/more work/other and have not had any opportunity to appreciate the results, and have been adopting a very clinical approach to this. 

Its mostly been like 'hmm. 200 gram decrease. cool'  as opposed to 'heey check me out in my improved butt!'   

But as of today I have taken time off work for the sake of chilling out, so I can finally breathe and get sleep amongst many other things…!

Looking forward to being in a mental state to actually enjoy doing the work outs (not crying to squeeze it in at 10pm), having enough time to eat (…discovered that the most effective way to not over eat…or even eat the amount you’re supposed to… is to not have enough time to do so)….….and more importantly spending time with Marcus darling who will be back in town-   yeey:-D!

※ Today is a happy day!!
-My bathroom scales 'defrosted' a couple of days ago and have managed to break through that once considered impossible to break through statistical wall, and I’m at minus 6Kgs J  hallelujah!

Day 56: mood shift/pic/assessment

OK… getting back to my semi-abandoned blog…

Have manage to hush up the little voices these days that had been predominating me especially week 5-6 ie/  'how can something so painful possibly be good for me??' 'I'm supposed to be listening to my body.......but what if its crying and telling me its need rest for 3 consecutive days??'

Took a mental shift to.... 'Beauty is pain'   (....im sure partick mentioned something about health benefits as well..... what were those agian? ) 'No pain no gain' 'Keep going if body is just crying.  If it dies on me and wont/cant move, then stop.' 'JFD'

Still reluctant to do bikini shots (maybe for the finale pic..) but currently looking something like this.

-Shrinkage in breast area appears to have plateaued.  ....underwear shopping?

-Some work left to do in inner thigh area.

-Got over 'chicken legs paranoia'

-Improvement in ab area…. More definition would be good.

Scales appear to have frozen over........but let’s not freak out. @ -4.9KG, -3.something % body fat.

Day 46 : The week's summary

This week's downs:

-Had a super intense week at work.....….. Wednesday was a particularly bad day and I went on a bit of a fruit binge.  On hindsight & thinking about the bigger picture I actually think it’s sort of cute, considering the nasty food groups I would’ve turned to pre-PCP life..... but at the time I felt SO guilty…. Never again!  (Contrary to expectations though, for some unkown reason the scales showed quite a drop the following day.. which I took was a sign from god that he’s giving me another chance.......)

-Amidst work chaos missed one too many egg whites in the morning.

-I think I’ve been fiddling around too much with the diets without confirming the validity of my choices, out of reluctance to add further complications to life.  Eg/ having ‘0 fat yogurt’ and ‘regular milk’, if that’s all that’s available during the day.

…..maybe I should check.

-Discovered the technicality issue that I will never be able to post comments on other peoples blogs via my own/office pc, ever.   ………sigh.         

This week's ups:

-Successfully worked my way around a social event!   I made modifications to the other meals prior to the event by cutting down portions, but had told people in advance about my initiative and they were all very supportive, making sure I got fed salad with the least amount of dressing on, and got the privilege of picking off all the veggie toppings on the pasta etc.  –I’m sure no one had any issues about eating my portion of pizza/ dessert…..

In terms of cost in VS food out,  it makes no sense whatsoever especially with the all-you-can-drink arrangement, but nevertheless it was nice to be partaking in regular social human activity for a change! 

-Statistics:   In order to set realistic expectations, before I enrolled in PCP I told Patrick my stats and asked how much weight I can expect to shift in 3 months if I bust my ass off..  He said 5-7Kgs.  So I decided to aim for –8Kgs, just to out do his predictions. But to ensure that actually happened I set my personal goals to -10Kgs. (I’m an ‘aim for the moon and land in the stars’ kinda gal)  

Day 46, I am -4.7Kgs :-D  I’m on track! (well… technically depends on where I perceive the actual goal to be I guess… but anyway). 

I know that numbers are not the universe…. But what the hell.    For now, yey, Go quantifiability!

Pics will follow soon.

************************************************************************** 

Re:comments

Tracey:  no doubt I would have troughed it down and out a long time ago if it weren’t for everyone else doing this..!  horaay for team spirit & SNS!

Helen:  Arigato!   Thinking white sand…blue sea…. pinacoladas….

Brent:  Thank you!:-D  I think I’m becoming a bit of a coffee addict as well…  I would ask Patrick how much coffee is too much… but why complicate life further?

Mini:  chicken legs on the beach, that’s’ the plan…!;-)  

Kos:   passing the half way mark really feels like an achievement doesn’t it?  Counting the days til freedom!!  (….and a life long obsession worrying about the calorie content of any food after all this educational brain washing, with the continual & ever lasting rigorous work outs to ensure the 3months of effort are not reversed..? oh well we shall see…)

Day 39: Emotional crash & recovery.

Mental state Monday-Friday 6pm:

Exhausted, in pain, over worked, over worked out, depressed, teary, philosophical. Ie/’what is the meaning of happiness?’ ’isn’t peak condition a relative term?’

Mental state Friday 7pm~now :

Marcus tells me we are going on a beach holiday once PCP is over,,,

Okey, motivation and energy levels back on track!!  

Meg… Just f-ing do it.

Post-depressive/philosophical & re-energized me on day 39.5>

Day 31 to 37: The Ups & The Downs

The Ups:

-Visited Hong Kong to see Marcus on the weekend!  :-D
Met up with some of the team mighty mouse crew (so........is this our official team name then?)          
From the right: Me, justin, terri, fergie, marcus.

Was great meeting you all.........  hope to see the rest of you guys in the near future too!

-Figured out what some of the workouts are actually supposed to look like. 
※Memo to self....: if everyone is complaining that something is excruciatingly painful but I'm not feeling it.... its most defiantly because I am doing it wrong.
Floor jumps are not cute, little & piddly-  they're long and high and make you want to kill your self.

-Didn't have one big indulgence, but had several moderate indulgences through out the 3 days I was in HK which was lovely,  eg/ more salad,  an odd dim sung here and there, a glass of wine etc.  (Well... the wine was lovely when I had it.  defiantly not so the next morning.  I don't know whether this counts as an 'up' or a 'down')


The Downs:

-Crazy work week...... complete lack of sleep. missed one work out and felt like such a loser afterwards.  Still trying to get over the self loathing

-I'm turning in to a PCP-centric bitch. 
When I first started out, I somehow thought I would be hating PCP by now, but what I am really hating is not the program itself but the circumstances/people that try to impede it.  I'm thinking things like........
'Welcoming party??..... why the hell did you have to join the organization now of all times??'
or
'Seriously,,,dont you f*->%+ dare talk to me when im jumping around between conference calls and I only have 4mins to consume my 150grams of fruit......cant you see the criticality of this apple?!'

-Forget the man arms I've been openly expressing my concerns for on the question thread..... what's the deal with my calves??  I am seriously starting to freak out.
I did not sign up to get chicken legs!!

-Weight went down on the weekend to -3.8kgs, but then came back up to -3.3kgs.
Weird.  Either gravity being different in HK, Marcus's scale being nice to me, me building more muscle or alternatively maybe I'm just somehow genuinely getting fatter on less food and more exercise..  I wonder which?  
Decided not to add more stress to life by thinking too much about it.

Shall flickr later.
Another week is upon us.... with one more egg white and one less banana for me!


Re: Comments
Justin:  Will probably post some paranoid chronicle w/pic about my enhanced calves soon....watch this space!
Kos:  Yeah... one of my challenges right now is not to get too caught & tied up with the micro-prespectives.  I MUST NOT TURN IN TO A BEAN COUNTER....,
Tracey: Thank you for the support!
Terri:  Voila-  enjoy the pic!  great meeting you guys, hope to see you again soon& thanks for the yoghurt info!
Patrick: There is 'toned' and then there is just plain 'butch'.  I'll give it the benefit of the doubt and see how it goes....
Helen:  thank you!  aah so they do come back? thats nice.  But do I dare ask...does anything else come back??            My curiosity keeps growing for life post day 90.....

Day 29- Picture.....avec critical self assessment.

DAY 29.5

A: More definition needed,,,,  Kill off the little hump in the middle

B: Hmm. interesting, my rib cage is smaller than I thought it was

C: Lose this softy area inside

D: I hope I dont build more muscle here!

E: Definitely smaller...but never mind. At the end of the day its only body fat (....you don’t mind do you marcus?)

F: yeey progress area:-)

G: Was wearing these shorts for my banner pic -they actually feel a bit loose.  That’s rather nice:-)

A month in, and I'm on track in terms of milestones....(as in post below) however the concern is that I don’t feel like I'm owning the situation at all yet. (I feel like the workouts are owning me, not the other way round),

& also the paranoia that the slow progress I have made will be instantly reserved if I have that single bite of indulgence....

Am hoping to have a positive shift in mental state over the next 4 weeks...!

Next month, I am fully assigned at work (I am an interpreter) and it looks like its going to be back- to-back meetings right the way through July.  I'm anticipating more stress to come along... but I can because I think I can (....right?):-D

By the way.... If I'm meticulously & desperately checking my schedule to see when I can possibly sneak in my fruit snack, before wanting to make sure I have enough time allocated to nail down briefing time with the presenter before we're on.....

This must mean I'm evolving in to a true PCPer...........!

*********************************************************

Re: Comments

Partick- That’s reassuring to know....thanks! 

Kos- I hope I stay on track…! There’s always a weight loss curve that I struggle with when things come to a stand

still… praying on my egg whites!

Marcus- minus 3.1Kgs now, so even better;-)

Day 24: The cloud & it's silver lining

Firstly, Re: Comments (...I think I’ve almost given up on fixing my crippled blog)

Bruce> Support much appreciated! Hmmmm…better than my motivation picture?  aim for the moon & land in the stars! :-D

Jason> I’m still managing to stay focused on the program, but these days I am actually developing concerns regarding something else…. I worry that I’m turning in to a nasty person who you wouldn’t want to be friends with!  
I mean… who would want to get buddy with snow white’s step mother??

Justin> Wow…. Really, that’s so cool!  Speaking of late night posts… I can’t seem to get decent sleep at all these days!  I thought it was just work, but I’m increasingly convinced it’s more to do with PCP-related stress.

Tracey> I actually tried to leave a comment on your blog just then but failed L  
You are so creative with your food, its amazing! I almost feel embarrassed reading about everyone’s culinary wonders,  the reason my kitchen is cleaner is because I’m not doing a hell of a lot of work in it these days!  Eating things raw, or just throwing everything in a pan and squeezing lemon over it later. (….80% of my meals end up tasting.. zesty)


Ok, so....about the cloud and the lining:


I'm feeling pretty miserable these days as I feel like I have no life...!  (Probably because I don't as such)  All work, no play!!!! (Job, side job, schooling, exercising, nutritionalizing....no socializing, no shopping, no comfort-dessert, no down time to chill out in general and unfortunately not enough sleep either)

But the one (......& perhaps only) consolation is that PCP-ing is on track (is it ironic that this is the cause of my pain and also the alleviator of it) and I am down 3KGs.

.....its not an overwhelming number compared with other peoples progress I've been seeing on their blogs...(how the hell do you guys do it??)   but it's still quite a big deal for me on a personal level, as I realize I have actually not been this mass since I was....15? 
(I am 26 now.  Over the past 10 years my height has changed by maybe 2CMs, weight has been pretty stable with some occasional fluctuations...but always one of an upward nature.)
-However back then I didn't have much going on in the bosom & booty area, so I think over all I'm evolving in to a better form.  Horaaaay :-D


Annual health check at work today:  & the nurse called me in to her office........ to ask me why I've suddenly lost weight (she's seen me around the office) and she asked me what my secret was...!  She did also tell me that it is not advisable to lose more than 1KG a month... but decided not to listen to her and did some PCP PR-ing while I was there.  She was intrigued. (Patrick....... I may have found you a new candidate for the next round!)

Also according to this health check...... I seem to have grown 3MMs since last year - which I assume is (an ever so slight) good news for the BMI too :-D  Joys!

Day20 -Observations

Firstly....
Re: Blog comments (sorry some of them are so late! was waiting for my blog to fix itself... which it never did)

Tracey: Hey I'm back to feeling hungry too after Partick cut my carbs! :-(  Good for you for staying off the chocolate!            I'm bracing my self for the next set of dietary requirements....

Terri:  Hope you had fun in italy!! (...the food temptation almost sounds torturesome) by the way it occured to me the other day that my shoe/hand size is not going to change becasue of PCP...
maybe it would be motivational to set monthly milestones to reward my self with shoe/bag shopping to push the process along..?

Marcus:  Ditto! ;-)

Karim:  I find window shopping is definaly a motivation booster for me!  I think I may want to start setting up a post-pcp splurge fund now.... weight goes down, fund goes up!

Patrick: Damn right...I used to feel bad about sending guilt waves around the office by passing on snacks as they came around, but now I actually believe I'm doing people a favour now.  Surely it couldn't hurt them to be more health conscious either!     Photos, will be on to it



Ok, so moving on to Day 20 Observations.

Assessed my current status after patricks email yesterday.... and it goes something like this:

Stress levels:  difficult to tell, becasue for the past 1.5 weeks I've been stressed with other non-PCP related stuff.... but I think this is exactly the kind of time I would be justifying a cookie stuffin'.... so I suppose not having to deal with added self loathing is a plus.

Yearning for dessert:  fluctuates. -Had to make an international call to marcus the other day so he'd talk me out of it.  It worked!

Hunger: its suprising how a 20-30gram reduction of daily carb intake can make a difference........ I'm back to being hungry again :-(

Strength:  I feel that my work outs are going better (no collapsing on the floor once I'm done, consistant control over bands as opposed to letting my arms drop on the way down with the davinchis etc), however in all hoestly, In my every day life  I feel totally drained from energy all the time!  this is worrying me.  a flight of stairs I used to be able to happily run up is now feeling like a great chore as my legs are still hurting from jump roping in the morning,,,, I hope this is just a passing transition phase.

Skin: Constant

Bowel movements:  Positive.

Libido:  increased

Body: I see.... hip bones?  coolio.

Sleep:  sub optimal... (but this is not becasue of PCP) I still dream about dessert.

Other things I noticed during the week:
External: -Women apparently dont really care about weight loss on other women....men are definalty more vigilant!  & more supportive.
-My kitchen is cleaner these days.
-Not many people in the world are actually that physically/health conscious!  A lot of people want to know about what I'm up to, but I have yet to come across anyone who wants to get on board with PCP them selves to eat better and exercise more.(no doubt I will out live them by 30years in a waay hotter body.)

Internal: 
-This whole project is really more a mental challenge than it is anything else.  the physical challenge of forcing out that last situp when I feel like my muscles are being ripped apart from within is one thing.....   but telling my self 10 times a day 'I am a goal orientated individual that likes to get shit done-  and the shit WILL get done! -i can becasue i think i can i can because i think i can......'  and actually focring my self in to believing & executing it is another thing.    So... inner strength. up!

-Intra-personal Communication.......I talk to my self more!  (I talk to my self a lot anyway... but they used to be more like mumblings.  Now they have turned in to articulated, enunciated full blown dialogues.   eg/   'Meg, I am going to tell you why you should not reach for that cookie.  First and foremost, ask your self whether you want it more than wanting to look like hot celebrity X,Y, or Z?  ...I thought not.  Now, let's cast our minds back to when you were 16 and used to work part time at millie's cookies at the arcade....   ')  
Yeah I know - verging on psychotic perhaps.  but it works!


Ok now...for some flickr-ing around....!

Day14 - Slow but steady progress

I'm getting mixed reactions around the office about my PCPing

-there are supportive people who will finish off my meal when eating out.

-there are evil people who try and talk me in to going out for drinks

-and people who offer me snacks to test me

-those who tell me 'meg you don't need to lose weight'.....  I think they are devils in disguise

-curious people who interrogate me with questions and think my digital scale is a toy to play with.......


.............I picture my self waltzing in to the office 76 days down the line dazzling out the place.


Day 14, down 2.4kgs and minus 2.5% body fat.   slow but steady progress!


Other recent achievements:

-befriending local restaurant staff to provide me with PCP balanced portions
-perfecting the art of elegant jump roping indoors as it's the rainy reason in Japan. (I'm skipping in a tiny Japanese apartment- I think its pretty remarkable!)
-culinary innovations
-awakening of taste buds.....discoving that food tastes perfectly good with out ketchup etc.
-saving a lot of money already from not buying snacks /going out drinking / shopping (....anticipating the great spree once I reach peak condition!)
-figuring out a)What a push up is supposed to look like  b)How to do something that resembles one.


Week 3...... bring it on!


※Am I the only one still having problems commenting on peoples blogs??